Apr 9, 2008

The First Turd Awards: Heston Obits

Editorial Cartoonists usually take a day off when a celebrity dies because they know they can churn out a shitty obit cartoon and not think for the rest of the day. The formula for an obit cartoon is quite simple: Draw the celebrity at the Pearly Gates and have St. Peter saying their most famous line. Presto! You're an editorial cartoonist (wait--please don't become one. The profession is dying and we don't need any innovative competition at this point.)

Cagle has a roundup of many of the comics. Most predictably use the "cold, dead hands" thing. (Dan Piraro did it years ago). But I'm shocked by the amount of people who thought having Moses meet Heston in heaven was an idea worth being printed.

I hate to publicly make fun of my fellow cartoonists, but, well, they really deserve it.

Turds are awarded on a scale of one to four. Four being the turdiest.



Moses and Heston are BFFs in heaven. Heston has even taken to wearing a press-on beard so balding angels can't tell them apart. (There's balding in heaven? Thanks god!)



John R. Rose
Byrd Newspapers of Virginia
Apr 9, 2008





This is the only Planet of the Apes reference I found. St. Peter decided to play a trick on Heston and donned an Ape mask! He then informs us that "Chuck's got a good sense of humor," which the artist must have put in there to let us know it was supposed to be funny.



MStreeter
Savannah Morning News
Apr 8, 2008





If this came out Monday I'd be a bit more forgiving. But it took Randy Bish three days to think up this stinker. Four turds. You win!



Randy Bish
Tribune-Review
Apr 9, 2008

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And one final note. I have to give a special award to Dean Turnbloom, who managed to do not one, but two Heston obit cartoons and not even draw Charlton Heston. I don't know if anyone's done anything like that before. One features Heston's open casket funeral and the second depicts his grave. Sometime between the funeral and the burial he must have switched guns---one shows a double-barreled and the other a regular rifle.

6 Comments:

Blogger Brubaker said...

John Rose deserved the award years ago when he took over "Snuffy Smith."

4:59 PM  
Blogger Kevin Moore said...

That's some good poo.

Alas, not even one Omega Man reference.

5:51 PM  
Blogger Matt Bors said...

Maybe when Will Smith dies, he can meet Heston in heaven and talk about his reprisal of the role in I AM Legend.

6:20 PM  
Blogger Tbloom said...

Hey, Matt, thanks for the special mention...does my heart good!

4:28 PM  
Blogger Matt Bors said...

no problem, Dean.

4:36 PM  
Blogger Chris Ekman said...

In a way, it's not even fair to include Mark Streeter, because he does obituaries for everybody, from Nobel Prize winners to beloved local football coaches. I swear he does 2 or 3 obits a week.

Randy Bish may be incredibly bland (I tried going through his archives on Cagle just to figure out what political persuasion he is, and came up empty), but I do like that the lettering on Moses' tablets is not English, nor Hebrew, but more like Klingon.

12:17 AM  

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