Illustration Friday

This appeared in a Seattle Weekly article on the "locavore" movement a few weeks ago.

TCJ

The 300th issue of The Comics Journal will be out in October and they did something special for this one. Check out the description released today by Fantagraphics.

Junk Science

As someone who is not a fan of The Huffington Post or so-called alternative medicine, I particularly liked this Salon article on how the site constantly publishes fringe medical quackery by unqualified, unpaid hacks.

Birthers Part 2

More entertaining video of congressmen refusing to acknowledge the president is a citizen of the country he leads.

John Birth Society

The human brain is capable of some incredible things. When you see a "birther" spouting nonsense about Obama's birthplace, what you are seeing is a racist whose feeble brain is trying to shield them from a psychological blow they cannot bear: admitting we have a legitimate black president. So their little racist neurons are rushing around working extra to hard to make sure certain facts don't make it through to the thinking and reasoning centers.

ThinkProgress.org has done a good job of chronicling all the insanity of late, my favorite so far being the video of a lawmaker who literally ran away when asked the simple question of whether or not the President was born in the US.

Related comics: Obama forged his gift certificate and Lou's other racist obsession.

Bipartisan Compromise

I'm glad that the kind of politicians who inhabit our capital today were not around at this country's founding.

Illustration Friday

An OC housewife didn't want the sounds of children playing in the nearby pool to ruin her sunbathing and reading. She has a tough life: no private pool!


Every hotel room has Gideon Bibles in it. It's a waste of trees. People don't rent hotel rooms to find the lord.

The Michelangelo of Mad

A slideshow of Basil Wolverton's art.

MailBag Douchebag: Bolging! Edition

Got some e-mails about yesterday's comic. Let's go through these. Matt K says I hate America and should be fired even though I don't have an employer:

Bolging (?) that some unnamed persons on the right (shadow enemy used to keep left wing nuts from thinking too much) advocate killing him is nothing more that a lie to try and justify your advocating killing him for the hate America thrill it gives you.

In my Bolg post yesterday I linked directly to the video that Matt thinks is a lie. I don't know what else I can do for him expect re-Bolg it here on the Bors Bolg. Kevin H. is another one who doesn't trust my Bolging:

could you please give me your news source for the 100 murdered GITMO detainees? I try to keep myself well informed, and I look at a number of sources each day for news, but that claim is a new one on me - perhaps it that news item came out when I was out camping for a few days.

Kevin must have been camping on the Appalachian Trail last year when Lawrence Wilkerson testified to Congress that over 100 detainees died in our custody. Tom Friedman even wrote about it so I consider it squarely within the bounds of the well informed. Kevin goes on to cite a study from the Quarterly Journal for Facts Pulled From Asses:

A study has been done, and 9 out of 10 prisoners agree: It is much better to be subjected to waterboarding and other "enhanced interrogation techniques" like sleep deprivation than it is to be subjected to "enhanced beheading techniques" - such as being beheaded with a jagged butcher knife. Who knew?

Everyone focuses on waterboarding as if it is the worst thing we engaged in. But let's look at the causes of death listed on the actual government documents released to the ACLU through a FOIA request..."strangulation," "Multiple gunshot wounds with complications" and "Shotgun wound of the head." Yikes! So yeah, the Taliban is crazy and cuts off heads. In the civilized world we use shotguns.

One Giant Leap for Hack-Kind...

That's what some recent obit cartoons on Walter Cronkite have been. Here's a great parody from Jack Ohman of The Oregonian. (It didn't run in the paper.)

Detainee Abuse

The capture of a US soldier by the Taliban has drawn a lot of media attention. Oddly, some on the right have come out in favor of the Taliban killing the soldier since there is speculation he may be a deserter. I'm not in that camp. I'd like him, and all other captives and detainees held illegally, to be released. The military's sudden concern for international law, however, is disingenuous. Even our new liberal president seems to believe the Geneva Conventions can be selectively applied to certain people and geographic areas.

Over 100 detainees captured since 2002 have been killed in US custody, many of which have been ruled as homicides by the military. I'm sure the others tripped and fell. These are people who were never even charged with crimes (not that it's OK to murder guilty folk).

We can't do much about the Taliban. They brutally oppress women and chop the heads off of journalists. But we do pay for--and theoretically control--the actions of our military.

Please Shoot Me

I made the mistake of turning on CNN tonight. Larry King was giving Joe Jackson free air time to spout all sorts of bizarre shit, such as claiming he never really beat Michael and the urgent need for Congress to open an investigation into MJ's death. I agree. Let's table health care reform for a while.

That segment was followed by King interviewing some woman who knows Debbie Rowe about Michael Jackson's sex life. A decrepit old man on his eighth or ninth wife was interviewing an unknown plastic surgery victim about her second-hand knowledge of Michael Jackson's sex life.

Then it was on to "AC 360." The first segment was about Michael Jackson. I could only think of August Pollak's latest cartoon on Cronkite.

John King was hosting "AC 360" and said you could log on to their website to find out why his eye was puffy. I'm not kidding.

Banning movies: Ach-ya or Nish-Nish?

The "Ministry of Culture and Tourism" in Ukraine has banned the movie Brüno. They cite "homosexual perversion" and say it "may harm the moral education of citizens."

CatieCat, writing at the popular feminist blog Shakesville, is torn. CC says government bureaucrats banning this film "does seem like rather a good thing" but this case is "a mixed bag" because the reasoning given for state censorship is not progressive enough.

One fewer countries running this crapfest is good. Doing so because it has the temerity to depict gay acts and male genitalia, rather than because it endangers the lives of your gay citizens, considerably less good.

I've gotten a laugh from all my progressive friends who think Brüno will somehow set the gay rights movement back 30 years, but this is taking the fear to whole new level. The movie isn't exactly Milk, but I don't think it was intended to be. A question for CatieCat: Given that Brüno "endangers the lives of gay citizens," would you ideally outlaw screenings in the United States?

Inappropriate right wing merchandise

A sodomy bib for every infant.

Unaired Sotomayor Grilling!

Frank Rich: "The senators seemed to have no idea they were describing themselves when they tried to caricature Sotomayor as an overemotional, biased ideologue."

That basically sums it up. I'd like to add: I think Jeff Sessions and Pat Buchanan should have a racist-off.

How To Draw Obit Cartoons

Tom Gammill has a helpful instructional video about obit cartoons.

Turd Awards: Harry Potter and Goblet of Turds

I did a Michael Jackson cartoon this week and felt guilty. At least I didn't cover Harry Potter. Usually blockbusters are forced into some crappy political metaphor by drawing a poster for the movie and labeling everything with current political problems. But the following cartoonists forgot to do that. Some of them almost seem like promotional material from Warner Bros. Good news: there is still two more summers of Harry Potter releases so cartoonists can phone it in.

We are up to are eyeballs this week. Let's plop some poop!

David Fitzsimmons does good work. I really love his drawing style. Even in this cartoon, I'll admit, I like some of the jokes. It's the best Harry Potter cartoon I've seen. But being the least-foul nugget in a sea of rancid poo still gets you a turd award: let's call this one The Half-Turd Prince.




I can imagine thousands of soccer moms cutting this one out to put on the fridge--a sure sign of a great editorial cartoon. One problem: it's on the editorial page where soccer moms won't see it because editorial pages are supposed to contain cartoons with opinions. I've seen more trenchant commentary in a Zits strip.

But perhaps there is more to this. It could be a criticism of how the West measures their distance from death in relation to summer blockbusters. Our ties to the changing seasons and lunar calendar are gone, replaced with a fantasy world of Hogwarts and Mugglesomethings. Probably not. Two turds.




I hope Luckovich got paid by at least one of the products he is shamelessly whoring in this comic. If you have a character in your movie drinking a Pepsi before a Decepticon breaks down his bedroom wall, it's all part of a business arrangement. Rueben Bolling recently announced he is auctioning off space in his comic to advertise a product. Mike should follow his lead and start charging. Until then, this cartoon gets three turds and an ifart app.





Finally, the steaming motherload. Two crappy movie franchises based on books for children and teens drawn by an adult to be printed in a newspaper aimed at old people. Brilliant! The icing on the turd is that this crappy mash-up cartoon serves no purpose, political or otherwise. The good news is that I can't smell the turds anymore because the noxious fumes coming off of this one melted my nose.

I'd knock off a turd if it at least made a ham-fisted attempt to say something--anything! Let's label the kids "GOP", the girl "Latinos" and the guy "Obama." There. Average crappy cartoon with three seconds of thought. This is our reigning champion for this week. The Goblet of Turds!

Old Illos

Here some old illustrations I came across wile digging for something and I don't think I ever got around to posting. They ran in a now-defunct newspaper in an article about the hazards of uranium mining.

On Outrage

Tim Kreider has a great column on nytimes.com about the good and bad that comes with cartooning while outraged. Kreider is the creator of the weekly strip "The Pain, When Will It End?" which he stopped drawing this year.

Outrage is like a lot of other things that feel good but over time devour us from the inside out. And it’s even more insidious than most vices because we don’t even consciously acknowledge that it’s a pleasure. We prefer think of it as a disagreeable but fundamentally healthy involuntary reaction to negative stimuli thrust upon us by the world we live in, like pain or nausea, rather than admit that it’s a shameful kick we eagerly indulge again and again.

Outrage can make for great cartoons. When you look back on them years later, as Kreider notes, they can appear shrill. You've calmed down since then. The immediacy wears off over time. But this medium is about timeliness and the times often call for outrage.

I'm always negotiating the balance between proper anger and humor in my work. Everyone has their own happy spot and I'm usually satisfied with the result (while simultaneously being unsatisfied with my work, of course). On one end of the spectrum you have someone like Mr. Fish, who draws uncompromising cartoons that often eschew humor to make political points. The other end is overrun with substanceless, witless gag cartoons. Trying to focus the outrage into solid work doesn't appear to be a concern for as many cartoonists as it should be.

Obligatory MJ Commentary

The Michael Jackson death-fest rolls on. I caught a segment on The Situation Room this week where my good friend Wolf Blitzer breathlessly reported on the rampant tabloid speculation about MJ being murdered. Wait until his image starts appearing in wood grain--they'll send in Candy Crowley to investigate.

Al Sharpton gave Michael an incredible eulogy. In front of the selfless philanthropist's gold sarcophagus, Sharpton credited him for the election of Barack Obama, the state of race relations as we know it and us loving each other. (We do love each other, don't we?) MJ did indeed break down barriers for African-Americans. Unfortunately he also broke down the barriers of what we previously thought a human face could/should look like.

Anyway, the only point I'm after here is that Prince is better than Michael Jackson. It's one of my Strongly Held Convictions along with torture and universal health care. He's far more talented, plays a ton of instruments, constantly releases good albums, doesn't lip sync or distract from his talent with elaborate dance sequences and his sexual eccentricities have always been limited to adults. He's a freak, but in a good way!

I Quit

Sarah Palin. WTF?

Those We Do Not Speak Of

It's astounding how many editorials, columns and cartoons assessing Robert McNamara's legacy fail to mention the existence of Vietnamese people, considering he helped kill over two million of them. David Broder of The Washington Post displays this callousness perfectly:

It was not until 1995, when he was again a private citizen, that McNamara published an apologetic memoir, revealing for the first time that he had harbored the gravest doubts about the war that took 58,000 American lives.

Were any other lives taken or did the North Vietnamese incur zero casualties with their impenetrable network of hand-dug tunnels? Broder goes on:

Opponents of the war said that if McNamara had made the reason for his "resignation" public at the time, Johnson might have been forced to end the war -- and thousands who died over the next seven years might have been saved.

To pay disproportionate attention to American casualties is expected of the media. To claim the death toll of the last seven years in Vietnam is measured in the "thousands" is simply inaccurate and inhuman. Does Broder or his editors think they have any responsibility to accurately characterize the death toll of a major war? Perhaps only the 4,000 American deaths are worth mentioning in the Iraq War.

Polls always show Americans are clueless when it comes the number of civilian deaths in countries we invade. Maybe they read The Post.

What The FoxTrot?

It's hard not to read anything else into this comic.

Turd Awards Canceled!

Given the glut of obit cartoons recently, I fully expected some on Oscar Mayer. Perhaps St. Peter could be munching on one of his all-beef kosher franks, remarking on their juiciness and affordability. Certainly there should have been a Wienermobile driving through the Pearly Gates. But the editorial cartoonists of America have failed to deliver. In light of this rare show of sanity and professionalism, the Turd Awards have been canceled.

If you did see any, let me know.

New Illos

An old man lets his Alzheimer's suffering wife do all the talking at the electronics store. Might work out if she wasn't into cussing nonsensically and berating people. I'm mean, I know.

A bar let a musician have free beers on all the nights he performed--then one day hit him with a bill. Must be the economy.

Cue More Crap

Oscar Mayer has now died, giving hacks their latest excuse for not thinking of a good cartoon. We truly are in the Platinum Age of obituary cartoons. Superstars, war criminals, hot dog dudes. No one is safe!

I smell turds a comin' on this one. And where there are turds, there are awards for them. Stay tuned.

McNamara

(click here to view)

Bruce Beattie Daytona Beach News-Journal Jul 8, 2009 EditorialCartoonists.com

I guess the two million Vietnamese people don't want to chat.

The Future Of News

The future is grim.

Interview

Daryl Cagle did a short video interview with me at the AAEC convention in Seattle.

Rejected Health Care Reforms

Kill Us To Save Us

Um...wow.

(via Tom Tomorrow)

MailBag

Maria does not like my comic about PETA's dead fly outrage:

You know, before you go passing undue judgment towards a rather large organization, you should probably read what was actually said. I don't really care if the strip wasn't supposed to be offensive, I'm tired of people portraying Peta members as whiny pussies. I may be sensitive towards animals, but that doesn't mean any jackass with a tired ass joke and an internet outlet can generalize me and not get a mouthful. Here is Peta's actual statement. Fact check next time? =]

I admire Maria standing up for herself and I have to own up here: I completely distorted PETA's response. They did not refer to the fly as "Morty Druckler." I made that name up along with all of his background information. I'm sorry if anyone was misled.

I think we all have a thing or two to learn about human/fly relations. We should start by following the advice of Peta blog commenter "Alyse":

I luv Obama. U can't always be conscious about everything all the time. He had a lapse in judgement. I myself ask flies to leave me alone. If 1 lands on me I ask it "Hey can u find another place to perch Mr. or Ms. Fly?"but I'm a lovey dovey15 yr old.He was in the middle of an ineterview. It must be hard to go from "Mr.Prez mode" to "I luv you fly mode"

Let's all try to spend more time in "I luv you fly mode".

July 4th